Inspired by Author Don Miguel Ruiz – The Four Agreements
We have the tendency to make assumptions about everything. The problem with making assumptions is that we believe they are the truth. We could swear they are real. We make assumptions about what others are doing or thinking – we take it personally – then we blame them and react by sending emotional poison with our word. That is why whenever we make assumptions, we’re asking for problems. We make assumptions, we misunderstand, we take it personally, and we end up creating a whole big drama for nothing.
We create a lot of emotional poison just by making assumptions and taking it personally, because usually we start gossiping about our assumptions. Gossiping is often the way we communicate with each other – transferring poison to one another. Because we are afraid to ask for clarification, we make assumptions, and believe we are right about the assumptions, then we defend our assumptions and try to make someone else wrong.
We make assumptions that everyone sees life the way we do. We assume that others think the way we think, feel the way we feel, judge the way we judge, and abuse the way we abuse. This is the biggest assumption humans make. And this is why we have a fear of being ourselves around others.
The way to keep ourselves from making assumptions is to ask questions. Make sure the communication is clear. If you don’t understand, ask. Have the courage to ask questions until you are clear as you can be, and even then do not assume you know all there is to know about a given situation. Once you hear the answer, you will not have to make assumptions because you will know the truth.
This is difficult to do because we so often do exactly the opposite. We have all these habits and routines that we are not even aware of. Become aware of the habits and understanding the importance of not making assumptions is the first step. Understanding is not enough. What really makes the difference is action. Taking action over and over again strengthens your will, nurtures the seed, and establishes a solid foundation for the new habit to grow.
After many repetitions this new way of being will become second nature, and you will see how your word and your world will become a space of creation, giving, sharing, and loving.